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Indeed....

100 Words Every High School Grad Should Know

This list is the stupidest thing I've ever seen. I have a Master's Degree in English and even I don't know some of these words. Methinks the Editors of the American Heritage Dictionaries are suffering from a case of inflated ego. A few of the words:

abjure
abrogate
abstemious
bowdlerize
expurgate
jejune
lugubrious
moiety
obsequious
orthography
pecuniary
unctuous

Honestly, I've gone through 35 years of living and never even heard these words used in conversation. More importantly, they are rarely used in writing as well. Why on earth would I bother wasting several Megabytes of brain capacity learning to use archaic words that are worthless in day-to-day usage? To display "linguistic superiority" over others? Only a silly dictionary editor could come up with this crap.

As a former Technical Writer, I think it's more important to stress how to use language simply. Tossing vocabulary at people is merely confusing for most of the population and leads to problems and lack of communication, especially when writing instructions or directions for people who speak English as a second language. Proposing words like this is nothing short of ignorant.

[100 Words Every High School Graduate Should Know]

Secret Celebrity Scientologists

Cracked.com has a list of secret celebrity Scientologists. You will be surprised.

[The Top 10 Secret Celebrity Scientologists]

Charles Nelson Reilly R.I.P. (1931 -2007)

This old queen gets props for being featured in a Dead Milkmen song.

I'm Into Clippy... nsfw

Microsoft Word's "Clippy" makes him hot.

---

[More Phonesex Pranks]

Mark Twain's "War Prayer"

Over at the Daily KOS, they have a copy of Mark Twain's "War Prayer"

Mark Twain kicked ass and took names.

Chairman Mao Lookalike

This is just creepy. Even moreso when you realize it's a woman.

[Chairman Mao Lookalike]

Celebrity Fit Club Gets All Violent - nsfw

I'd like to see Screech get his beat-down for rolling that little dude from Welcome Back Kotter a few years back. Karma is a bizzle.

Video: UFC: Liddel vs. Rampage UFC 71

For all you MMA junkies, check out Liddel vs. Rampage: UFC 71.

Video: Tokyo Conveyor Belt Sushi

This is one of the best ideas ever. Go into a conveyor belt sushi place and put your camera on the track. This being Tokyo, no one bothered to steal it.

This type of long shot would be great as an opening sequence for a movie. It's almost surreal as each face is captured in perfect focus by the camera, as it travels into the kitchen, and finally back out again.

11-year-old Bags Gargantuan Hog

Unbelievable.



[Wild Hog article]

Dude Tests Tazer ... On Himself!

Dumb-ass.

[Bitch**SlaPP dot com]

Why is His Microwave Hot?

This is why it's hot. Keep an eye out for a crunk appearance by the Flying Spaghetti Monster.



[Microwave Hotness]

Review of New Frank Black Album - Blue Finger

First off, thanks to Todd for hooking us up with the new Frank Black album, Blue Finger. We love us some Frank Black and, before his solo sucksess, we worshipped at the altar of The Pixies with devotion. I've always loved Frank Black's lyrics and energy. Blue Finger certainly doesn't lack his trademark lyrical insanity or guttural punk yelping.

But the question I keep asking myself is: has the great Black Francis lost his touch, or has his sound just grown tiresome? I think it's the latter, really. There's nothing really cutting-edge here, which isn't really a bad thing. But it's not a good thing, either. Despite the lack of Pixies lushness on most of these tracks, Frank solo still rocks pretty hard, and the lyrics are as cryptic as ever. There's just something ... missing.

What's lacking from Frank Black hitting it big with all these albums he's released over the years? I mean, the formula is the same for what he produces on his own and what he puts out with The Pixies. I've come to the conclusion that it's the chemistry of Kim Deal's back-up vocals that are lacking, really. Kim Deal added a soothing layer (a near-mantra of chorus) to Frank's quirky screeching, and I think he's starting to realize this, as he has notable female back-ups on many of these songs ("Lolita," my favorite on the album does it well, while "You Can't Break a Heart and Have It" falls into its own ambitious punkishness with a flop). Nevertheless, the female back-up doesn't make a good enough impression when executed correctly to push things over the edge into the 5-star Ipod zone.

Joey Santiago's skilled guitarism's are also missing from the equation. During The Pixies reunion tour, it was very evident during an incredible guitar solo just how influential Joey's sound is to the band. And even if Frank manages to get a good female back-up singer, I think he might be dead in the water without an actual Joey on guitar. For a prime example of how this hurts his sound, give "She Took All the Money" a spin. Now, imagine what this song would sound like with Joey on guitar.... Whole different animal.

These songs are conceptually great. I would like to see what The Pixies could do with these songs if they all worked on these pieces together, as there is a notable lack of detail to some of the songs (most notably, "Your Mouth Into Mine"). "Blue Finger" seems to be cryptically prescient when Frank belts out "If my choices are poor, I made them, I made them. And who's knocking on my door, I paid them. I paid them!"

Frank needs to dust off his ego and cement the dominance of The Pixies, once and for all. Doing otherwise only dooms his poetry to obscurity, and that's the opposite of what the world could use.

Sifted: 6.5/10

Battle of the Dorks: American Idol Winner is...

Jordin Sparks.

Tonight was more than mildly entertaining.

First off, Kelly Clarkson should stick to gowns, not wear halter-tops and low-rise hip-huggers that showcase her muffin top. Jenny Craig or cocaine. Pick one.

Jordin Sparks won, as it should be. The girl has pipes, and considering she's only 17, I expect we'll be seeing a lot of her. She's so endearing and annoying at the same time, kind of like a younger sister.

What seemed peculiar about the show was how Britney Spears was a no-show. God knows, we watched the entire show in dire expectation that she would make a puke-worthy performance "grand" appearance.

Speaking of "grand appearances," what was up with that Slick Rick Dougie Fresh/Blake joint? That was actually noteworthy and left us wondering: WHY THE HELL DIDN'T HE DO THAT LAST NIGHT?!?!?

We're pissed off because the show ran long and our DVR ended a full 5 minutes before they announced the winner. WTF? That's just not cool, FOX. Think of the millions of people who came home to watch your bogus show only to be disappointed by your lack of premature congratulations. End on time, dammit!

Fatty Gets a Suck Job

You dirty-minded pervert.

Cat that Eats with a Fork

Something tells me the cat could care less about Tiger Woods.

The Hood Internet

Excellent site for music mash-ups. You can listen or download with just a few clicks.

[The Hood Internet]

Why Kucinich Can't Win

Face it, Kucinich has a HOT wife.

She's Lord of the Rings princess of the Elves, Galadriel, hot.

Meanwhile, Kuciznitch himself looks like Gollum on red bull.

He'd be the first president to die in office from a Viagra overdose.

Animal Battle Royal

This is better than Animal Planet!

Waterboarding

No, it's not a sport, unless you're participating in the Sadistic Olympics.



Since when is torture allowed by the Geneva Convention? Er, do we even follow the Geneva Convention anymore?

Passive-Aggresive Notes

This reminds me of the long treatise on proper bathroom etiquette at my former job. Someone felt the need to explain how to use a plunger. Oy.

[Passive-Aggressive Notes from ...]

Operating Notes for Dispensing Machine

Classic.


[Operating Notes for Dispensing Machine]

Finishing Moves Def Jam Icon Missed

It's simple enough to look at a game and see what's good about it, but on a recent gaming session with Def Jam: Icon, I found myself wondering what was missing, and why.

• Why can't I pull my opponents jewelry right off his neck? I mean, if you're giving your adversary a major whoop-ass, shouldn't you be able to diss a bitch by ripping off his tin?
• Why can't I pull my shirt off and flex? I should be able to lift my arms and flaunt my armpit deodorant, ala LL Cool J on MTV's Unplugged.
• Why can't a hard punch knock somebody's grill straight out they mouf?
• Shouldn't I have a dance of victory after I'm done rollin' somebody?
• No homies to have my back? Even my boo ain't there to cheer me on?
  
• If you can beat me to a bloody pulp, why doesn't that ruin my fly gear? Why don't that shit spill on the floor? Cuz I'm bad-ass, that's why.
  
• If I can attack somebody with the sound coming out the stereo speakers, why can't I cause them to have a burst eardrum, or something novel like making them pee or puke themselves?
• No weapons?
• Rap without gunfights is like Disneyland without Goofy.
• What, no nappy-headed hos or stripper sluts to cheer me on after I lay the smackdown?
  

Isn't it a little bizarre that a fighting game can be made so sanitized and just plain boring? I mean, I can beat somebody until they're literally black and blue, but I can't have my character smoke a blizzle with my adversary after we're done with our fisticuffs? Talk about boring. I'm surprised the cops didn't show up to break up all these stupid confrontations. Clearly, that's what's needed in Def Jam: Icon II. Puhleeze.

Don't hate. Just keepin' it real.

Neuromancer Coming to the Big Screen

William Gibson's seminal sci-fi classic, Neuromancer, is finally going to be made into a film. I somehow doubt it will be any good, but at least someone will try to make that grand vision a reality. Now if only they could get Ridley Scott (of Blade Runner fame) to direct it!

[Neuromancer to be made into movie]

Cthulhu for President - 2008

He's got my vote.

Bizarre, Creepy Rabbit Animation

Too strange!

What the hell?

I don't know whence this hell spawn of a video came from, but it's kinda catchy, if you like dentist drills, that is.

Imax 3D

Apparently, when you see a movie in Imax 3D, it makes boobs bigger.

[Harry Potter Sexified by Imax 3D]

Spider Ear

Why doesn't it surprise me that this happened in Oregon?

What Does $456 Billion Buy?

Things your government could have bought you instead of tossing the cash at Iraq.

[What does $456 Billion Buy?]

David Blaine Parody

Check it out here.

DRM Group Vows to Fight Bloggers

Talk about a bunch of morons. They already lost the battle before it's even gotten started! What, are they gonna go erase the entire internet in the hopes that no one will get their grubby hands on their precious numbers? Talk about stupid.

[Dumbass Article]

Clone Movies: Similar Movies Released Within a Year

A must-read for movie lovers.

[Attack of the Clones: Suspiciously Similar Movie Showdown]

The Return of Absinthe -Now Legal in the US

Expect this to be the trendy drink at the bar for the next decade. Lucid Absinthe now legal in the US. Available starting next month ($59.95 for 750 mL).

[Absinthe: The American Remix]

Lolcats meets Star Trek

Tribbles.... This is pretty humorous.

[LolTrek]

Rage Against The Machine Thrashes Administration

Rage never disappoints. Sunday's performance at Coachella had Rage calling for the treasonous death of the Bush Administration. Why can't every band be so passionate?

[Rage Against the Machine Rages at Coachella Music Festival]