Finishing Moves Def Jam Icon Missed

It's simple enough to look at a game and see what's good about it, but on a recent gaming session with Def Jam: Icon, I found myself wondering what was missing, and why.

• Why can't I pull my opponents jewelry right off his neck? I mean, if you're giving your adversary a major whoop-ass, shouldn't you be able to diss a bitch by ripping off his tin?
• Why can't I pull my shirt off and flex? I should be able to lift my arms and flaunt my armpit deodorant, ala LL Cool J on MTV's Unplugged.
• Why can't a hard punch knock somebody's grill straight out they mouf?
• Shouldn't I have a dance of victory after I'm done rollin' somebody?
• No homies to have my back? Even my boo ain't there to cheer me on?
  
• If you can beat me to a bloody pulp, why doesn't that ruin my fly gear? Why don't that shit spill on the floor? Cuz I'm bad-ass, that's why.
  
• If I can attack somebody with the sound coming out the stereo speakers, why can't I cause them to have a burst eardrum, or something novel like making them pee or puke themselves?
• No weapons?
• Rap without gunfights is like Disneyland without Goofy.
• What, no nappy-headed hos or stripper sluts to cheer me on after I lay the smackdown?
  

Isn't it a little bizarre that a fighting game can be made so sanitized and just plain boring? I mean, I can beat somebody until they're literally black and blue, but I can't have my character smoke a blizzle with my adversary after we're done with our fisticuffs? Talk about boring. I'm surprised the cops didn't show up to break up all these stupid confrontations. Clearly, that's what's needed in Def Jam: Icon II. Puhleeze.

Don't hate. Just keepin' it real.